Tomorrow at 2p.m. I'm heading out with 27 others to serve our amazing and wonderful Father in Mexico. I am nervous, I am excited. I cannot wait to see what transformation God will not only make in those we are serving but also my fellow com padres and myself. I think I might need the most work, but God does love a work in progress. I smile when I think of how amazing and wonderful God is and that originally I was not going to be able to go on this trip because of work and then that door closed and I get the amazing opportunity to go to Mexico and serve.
I came home today to the for sale sign in my front yard. I knew it was coming, but it just hurts. I know that a home is wherever you are, and your family and God and love. And I know I will have another home, but letting go of the first one is proving to be harder than I thought. My Realtor is showing it twice on Monday, I am honestly glad that I will be out of town. I remember when we sold our house in Mt. Ranch. And how upset I was, being only 13 I didn't understand why my parents were splitting up, let along why we were selling MY house. And now here I am 12 years later selling my first house. I have to keep bringing myself back to the Lord and remembering that even he though he takes away he provides as well. And I just pray that he will continue to do that for me.
On the job front.....I have 6 applications out. All across the country. And 5 of the 6 close tomorrow and the last one emailed yesterday and said they would be reviewing them next week.
Here is the list:
Tahoe City, CA
North Bend, WA
Rockwall, TX
Golden, CO
Richland County, MT
Bellevue, WI
What is everyone's vote!!???
I know it's crazy that only one of the jobs is in California. Trust me I have heard it from everyone. Though I love my friends and family dearly I have to take this opportunity to at least see what else is out there. I feel I owe myself that at least. The last time I had the opportunity to look else where I didn't, mainly because I wasn't ready to leave the Central Valley, I was dating someone, and honestly God had another plan. To bring me to Reedley.
But I feel this door is closed, and I am ready to be wherever God wants and needs me to be. So here is praying that one of these turns into a job.
Next time you hear from me I will be back from Mexico hopefully a more inspired and stronger messenger of the gospel (with a few job interviews too). Pray for us!
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Life is amazing and beautiful
This past weekend was AMAZING. I love my friends. And got to meet new ones such as Chloe, and Molly, and John. And got to experience Disneyland with some amazing people. Who couldn't have enjoyed that?
So here we are at beginning:
And then all of us on the Haunted Mansion ride Day 2:
AND MY FAVORITE RIDE:
California Adventure at night:
And us at the end:
So here we are at beginning:
And then all of us on the Haunted Mansion ride Day 2:
AND MY FAVORITE RIDE:
California Adventure at night:
And us at the end:
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Live like no one else, so you can live like no one else.
Who has read, listened to, learned and laughed with Dave Ramsey??
He teaches on financial freedom and his most commonly taught class is called financial peace university. While I am not currently enrolled in his class I am forever indebted to my dear friend Dawn for lending me the CD's from her class. They have given me hope when everything looked a little dim.
His main motto is "Live like no one else, so you can live like no else" This takes sacrifice, it takes going against the grain of the typical American. I'm done being the middle class citizen and I am going to work my way to financial freedom and wealth! Perfect timing when I'm unemployed with around $5,000 in debt looming over me!
He lists in your budget as necessities being food, clothing, transportation, utilities, and shelter. Basic stuff right???
The first thing I could knock off the necessities list is clothing! Who knew all of the Gma's shopping would help me in the long run!
I received my unemployment benefits statement yesterday, who knew the state would actually be timely on something??? :) And the monthly amount will cover the necessities listed. And that is it. Literally. Other than about $1,000 in savings I have no other money. Who knew the 3-6 months in expenses was a good idea??
But of course like the average American I have bills other than the necessities which include credit cards, cell phone bill (he covers basic phone in his necessities list, I'm wondering if my $79 bill is a necessity??? :)), gym membership, etc. These "bills" even with the credit cards at a minimum total $375 a month. Woah. Where am I going to find $375 a month even for one or two months until I find a job?
(And the sad part is the unemployment is $700 less than I made full time, and where did that money go??????)
One of Dave Ramsey's theories when you are in debt is to sell everything you can sell in your house until the kids think they are next.
So a lot of the extras that have filled my house are up on craigslist. Go check them out! I know what you are thinking! Am I losing it?? Selling my stuff? I can always buy new stuff later when I have the cash and the means to do so.
And the question that is resting on everyone's mind..the house. My first house. My own space. All mine. It's going on the market. I'm getting out from underneath it before I lose myself trying to hold on to something like a house. I am fourtante to have options in terms of place to live if the house sells before I have a job. And I am so greatful, it makes the decision to sell the house easier because I know I will not be homeless.
It finally hit me today after much speclation that this door is closing, not just the door that closed when I stopped working for the City but the door of living in the central valley. Today my therapist was walking through all my options with me and she said this and a light bulb when off: "You seem to already have one foot out the door." And I guess I do, it's like I've been slowly inching there. And while I know there are many people here that I love dearly, and memories, and places that I love it's time for the next chapter. And I know people will be dissapointed that I am leaving but I truly feel its time.
I've been hesistant to make decisions over the last month because I honestly think I wanted God to say here! Here is the perfect plan, I made it and here it is. And lay it out for me. And he hasn't completely done that. And I can't spend my life waiting for that moment of perfect clarity. Because that's be honest, when is God going to completely show us the cards??? I know he is walking beside me and I have to remember him in everything I do. If I make a poor decision I know it will be revealed and He will walk with me. Good or bad or indifferent He is here as long as I ask Him to be and I trust in Him. And I'm trusting in Him by taking this leap of faith and walking head first into my future. Wherever that may be.
He teaches on financial freedom and his most commonly taught class is called financial peace university. While I am not currently enrolled in his class I am forever indebted to my dear friend Dawn for lending me the CD's from her class. They have given me hope when everything looked a little dim.
His main motto is "Live like no one else, so you can live like no else" This takes sacrifice, it takes going against the grain of the typical American. I'm done being the middle class citizen and I am going to work my way to financial freedom and wealth! Perfect timing when I'm unemployed with around $5,000 in debt looming over me!
He lists in your budget as necessities being food, clothing, transportation, utilities, and shelter. Basic stuff right???
The first thing I could knock off the necessities list is clothing! Who knew all of the Gma's shopping would help me in the long run!
I received my unemployment benefits statement yesterday, who knew the state would actually be timely on something??? :) And the monthly amount will cover the necessities listed. And that is it. Literally. Other than about $1,000 in savings I have no other money. Who knew the 3-6 months in expenses was a good idea??
But of course like the average American I have bills other than the necessities which include credit cards, cell phone bill (he covers basic phone in his necessities list, I'm wondering if my $79 bill is a necessity??? :)), gym membership, etc. These "bills" even with the credit cards at a minimum total $375 a month. Woah. Where am I going to find $375 a month even for one or two months until I find a job?
(And the sad part is the unemployment is $700 less than I made full time, and where did that money go??????)
One of Dave Ramsey's theories when you are in debt is to sell everything you can sell in your house until the kids think they are next.
So a lot of the extras that have filled my house are up on craigslist. Go check them out! I know what you are thinking! Am I losing it?? Selling my stuff? I can always buy new stuff later when I have the cash and the means to do so.
And the question that is resting on everyone's mind..the house. My first house. My own space. All mine. It's going on the market. I'm getting out from underneath it before I lose myself trying to hold on to something like a house. I am fourtante to have options in terms of place to live if the house sells before I have a job. And I am so greatful, it makes the decision to sell the house easier because I know I will not be homeless.
It finally hit me today after much speclation that this door is closing, not just the door that closed when I stopped working for the City but the door of living in the central valley. Today my therapist was walking through all my options with me and she said this and a light bulb when off: "You seem to already have one foot out the door." And I guess I do, it's like I've been slowly inching there. And while I know there are many people here that I love dearly, and memories, and places that I love it's time for the next chapter. And I know people will be dissapointed that I am leaving but I truly feel its time.
I've been hesistant to make decisions over the last month because I honestly think I wanted God to say here! Here is the perfect plan, I made it and here it is. And lay it out for me. And he hasn't completely done that. And I can't spend my life waiting for that moment of perfect clarity. Because that's be honest, when is God going to completely show us the cards??? I know he is walking beside me and I have to remember him in everything I do. If I make a poor decision I know it will be revealed and He will walk with me. Good or bad or indifferent He is here as long as I ask Him to be and I trust in Him. And I'm trusting in Him by taking this leap of faith and walking head first into my future. Wherever that may be.
Friday, July 2, 2010
A place....
There is a place nestled east of Stockton in the foothills of the Sierras. In recent years this place has aquired the more status quo stuff like starbucks and lowes and subways. This is a place where the people per square mile is less than the cows, where there are no stop lights, where you can leave your car and front door unlocked at night and nothing will happen. Where the biggest town has 6,000 people.
This place is called Calaveras County.
And this is place that I grew up in. Where I participated in 4-H, raised steers, sheep, goats, and my closest neighbor was over a mile. Where I met my best friends, learned to love football sitting in a crowded home bleacher under the lights on a Friday night. Where I learned to drive. Where I made many mistakes, cried many tears and loved many people.
Everytime I come back I feel differently about this place and the special place it holds in my heart. I went to dinner with my mom on Thursday night and ran into my 4th grade teacher. This morning one of the first people I met in kindergarten called because she knew I was home and wanted to catch up. This afternoon I came to Starbucks to write this post and spent 30 minutes catching up with a friend I haven't seen in 10 years. Like I said everyone knows you, and knows what you are up to even if you haven't been home in eyars.
Coming home under the current conditions makes me look at life a little differently. This place will always have a piece of my heart. No matter where I consider moving or where I end up, there is something about Calaveras County that I can't seem to walk away from.
It's a place that created who I am and helped build the person I am today. And even though its country, and small and there are nosy people here I love it. This is the place I call home and even when I have no idea what I'm doing I know that Calaveras County will always be there if I need a reminder of where I came from.
This place is called Calaveras County.
And this is place that I grew up in. Where I participated in 4-H, raised steers, sheep, goats, and my closest neighbor was over a mile. Where I met my best friends, learned to love football sitting in a crowded home bleacher under the lights on a Friday night. Where I learned to drive. Where I made many mistakes, cried many tears and loved many people.
Everytime I come back I feel differently about this place and the special place it holds in my heart. I went to dinner with my mom on Thursday night and ran into my 4th grade teacher. This morning one of the first people I met in kindergarten called because she knew I was home and wanted to catch up. This afternoon I came to Starbucks to write this post and spent 30 minutes catching up with a friend I haven't seen in 10 years. Like I said everyone knows you, and knows what you are up to even if you haven't been home in eyars.
Coming home under the current conditions makes me look at life a little differently. This place will always have a piece of my heart. No matter where I consider moving or where I end up, there is something about Calaveras County that I can't seem to walk away from.
It's a place that created who I am and helped build the person I am today. And even though its country, and small and there are nosy people here I love it. This is the place I call home and even when I have no idea what I'm doing I know that Calaveras County will always be there if I need a reminder of where I came from.
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
A door closed...
Dear Ms. Margaret Littleton:
Thank you for considering Cosumnes Community Services District Parks and Recreation Department, and for the time and energy you dedicated to our recruitment process for the current part-time Recreation Coordinator in the Teens and Skate Park.
This recruitment process provided the District with a large pool of qualified candidates. Although your background and qualifications meet some of our requirements and/or preferences, they are not the exact match we were looking for to fill this position at this time.
Your name and application will be kept on an eligibility list for 90-days. In the event another Coordinator position becomes available a Human Resources representative may contact you to schedule an interview.
Again, on behalf of the Cosumnes Community Services District, we thank you for your interest in applying for this position, and encourage you to continue to watch our web site at www.yourcsd.com for future employment opportunities.
Sincerely,
Human Resources
So the first of the closed doors.........................................
I have a million and one questions, need a million and one answers. But I can't even start to think of what they are or what order they should be in........
Thank you for considering Cosumnes Community Services District Parks and Recreation Department, and for the time and energy you dedicated to our recruitment process for the current part-time Recreation Coordinator in the Teens and Skate Park.
This recruitment process provided the District with a large pool of qualified candidates. Although your background and qualifications meet some of our requirements and/or preferences, they are not the exact match we were looking for to fill this position at this time.
Your name and application will be kept on an eligibility list for 90-days. In the event another Coordinator position becomes available a Human Resources representative may contact you to schedule an interview.
Again, on behalf of the Cosumnes Community Services District, we thank you for your interest in applying for this position, and encourage you to continue to watch our web site at www.yourcsd.com for future employment opportunities.
Sincerely,
Human Resources
So the first of the closed doors.........................................
I have a million and one questions, need a million and one answers. But I can't even start to think of what they are or what order they should be in........
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
New Adventures
After my last post my Summer Day Camp kids surprised me with a beautiful hand made sign and cupcakes! And then camping with my best friends from high school, it was nice to be home in Calaveras County. Makes me miss that place sometimes.
Came back to my cousin's on Sunday to get ready for my interview on Monday. Interviews make me nervous. I'd much rather be on the other side of the table which is where I've been for over the last two years. Because I'm my biggest critic I'm not sure how I did, I was the last of 14 people on Monday. I wanted to say "saved the best for last" but that was before I learned there was another day of interviews today. And if I get selected second interviews will be on Thursday.
So if that door closes where will I be?
That is a great question. And I have no idea where I will be but I do know that I'm ready for the adventure. Is it scary? Yes. Do I have any idea where I will end up? No. But I know that the Lord has the plan. He will open doors and he will close them. And I have to just keep walking through the open ones until they close. Keep applying for jobs until I'm chosen for that perfect one. I'm not sure when that will be. I'm not sure if I will stay in Reedley. Or if I move when that will be. I have learned over the last month that as much as I'd like to stay in my beautiful house in this beautiful town, there are plenty of opportunities out there. I am young, not tied down, pretty much the sky is the limit. As long as I'm willing to let it be. I'm learning to let go of the anxiety because as my trusted therapist told me anxiety is only worrying about what hasn't happened. Basically it's worrying about things only God has control over.
So back to my original question. If God closes the Elk Grove door tomorrow, I'm throwing my application out in these two places:
www.visittahoecity.com - for Recreation Coordinator almost identical to the one in Reedley.
http://ci.north-bend.wa.us/ - for a Recreation Supervisor in Athletics.
Both far from Reedley. Both in places I've never lived. But the beauty in this journey is that I know I will end up in the perfect place, better than I could imagine. And I can only sit back and enjoy the ride.
Both jobs close July 16th, so we shall see what happens......I'll keep you guys posted.
Came back to my cousin's on Sunday to get ready for my interview on Monday. Interviews make me nervous. I'd much rather be on the other side of the table which is where I've been for over the last two years. Because I'm my biggest critic I'm not sure how I did, I was the last of 14 people on Monday. I wanted to say "saved the best for last" but that was before I learned there was another day of interviews today. And if I get selected second interviews will be on Thursday.
So if that door closes where will I be?
That is a great question. And I have no idea where I will be but I do know that I'm ready for the adventure. Is it scary? Yes. Do I have any idea where I will end up? No. But I know that the Lord has the plan. He will open doors and he will close them. And I have to just keep walking through the open ones until they close. Keep applying for jobs until I'm chosen for that perfect one. I'm not sure when that will be. I'm not sure if I will stay in Reedley. Or if I move when that will be. I have learned over the last month that as much as I'd like to stay in my beautiful house in this beautiful town, there are plenty of opportunities out there. I am young, not tied down, pretty much the sky is the limit. As long as I'm willing to let it be. I'm learning to let go of the anxiety because as my trusted therapist told me anxiety is only worrying about what hasn't happened. Basically it's worrying about things only God has control over.
So back to my original question. If God closes the Elk Grove door tomorrow, I'm throwing my application out in these two places:
www.visittahoecity.com - for Recreation Coordinator almost identical to the one in Reedley.
http://ci.north-bend.wa.us/ - for a Recreation Supervisor in Athletics.
Both far from Reedley. Both in places I've never lived. But the beauty in this journey is that I know I will end up in the perfect place, better than I could imagine. And I can only sit back and enjoy the ride.
Both jobs close July 16th, so we shall see what happens......I'll keep you guys posted.
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Goodbyes
So I thought I could mentally prepare for my last few days. Though I expected a few tears, and hugs and maybe a few cards I got even more than that. It's funny how truly unpredictable life really is.
Monday I had lunch with my supervisor, mentor and good friend Sarah and that was my first goodbye moment. She gave me a card and what was written of course made me cry.
Going into the rest of the week I thought I could make it through, I'm tough I can do this. Made it through my potluck on Wednesday which was awesome! Good food, conversations and a chance for all of us to hang out and say goodbye. I lost it when I walked back into my office. There was a card on my desk and I opened it and it talked about saying goodbye and how I will be missed and then I opened it. A $100 VISA gift card fell out. All it said inside was Your friend, Dana. And I started bawling right there, all reserves and emotions I was trying to hold in flooded out. You are probably wondering why it affected me so much but you have to understand the type of person Dana is. He's quiet and reserved and doesn't joke about much. He will go to the end of the earth for anyone and will help out even if he doesn't have to. He's always gone above and beyond for all my programs and I've always appreciated it. He's just done so with few words. So for him to make the big gesture touched me.
Then I got flowers from Reedley Youth Football thanking me for all the work I put in to help their program.
And then this morning Sarah asked if I wanted to go to the pool. Of course! We walk in and everyone scrambles like they got caught with their hand in the cookie jar. And then they say they got me something. Cue the tears. They are an amazing and talented staff that I love dearly so for them to do something like that for me just melts my heart :)
I write this on my lunch sitting in the unlabeled but official recliner that my boss Joel usually sits for my last few moments this afternoon. So here is our last official staff picture. They are truly an amazing bunch!
It's only 1p.m. so who knows what could happen before 5 :)
Monday I had lunch with my supervisor, mentor and good friend Sarah and that was my first goodbye moment. She gave me a card and what was written of course made me cry.
Going into the rest of the week I thought I could make it through, I'm tough I can do this. Made it through my potluck on Wednesday which was awesome! Good food, conversations and a chance for all of us to hang out and say goodbye. I lost it when I walked back into my office. There was a card on my desk and I opened it and it talked about saying goodbye and how I will be missed and then I opened it. A $100 VISA gift card fell out. All it said inside was Your friend, Dana. And I started bawling right there, all reserves and emotions I was trying to hold in flooded out. You are probably wondering why it affected me so much but you have to understand the type of person Dana is. He's quiet and reserved and doesn't joke about much. He will go to the end of the earth for anyone and will help out even if he doesn't have to. He's always gone above and beyond for all my programs and I've always appreciated it. He's just done so with few words. So for him to make the big gesture touched me.
Then I got flowers from Reedley Youth Football thanking me for all the work I put in to help their program.
And then this morning Sarah asked if I wanted to go to the pool. Of course! We walk in and everyone scrambles like they got caught with their hand in the cookie jar. And then they say they got me something. Cue the tears. They are an amazing and talented staff that I love dearly so for them to do something like that for me just melts my heart :)
I write this on my lunch sitting in the unlabeled but official recliner that my boss Joel usually sits for my last few moments this afternoon. So here is our last official staff picture. They are truly an amazing bunch!
It's only 1p.m. so who knows what could happen before 5 :)
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